Climate prat of 2016 – We have a winnah!


I did wonder if it was worth running this years competition, because it seemed to me there would be little or nothing in the way of any excitement occurring, since there only appeared to be one horse in the race, and he was already galloping over the horizon before it had even began. The rest would be plodding along miles behind … Continue reading

The Pratties 2016 – The race is on!


After a long run of political articles covering a few serious events, it’s time to get back to having a bit of fun, by which I mean running the Climate Prat of the Year competition. If you’re not familiar with the term prat, you can find a rough description of them here, which should be enough … Continue reading

Report on GOLGAFRINCHAM B3-1


This is another guest article by Graeme No3, one of our regular contributing writers. Like all good satire, it gets uncomfortably close to the underlying reality. The names of people mentioned in it have been changed to protect the guilty, but see how many you can pick out … Pointman —-<0>— To: Director Intergalactic Traffic From: … Continue reading

Climate prat of 2015 – We have a winnah!


It’s 16:57 GMT, 23rd December in the year of our lord twenty and fifteen and I’m calling it. Vote away, but until I can get Vladdi to disable it, the voting widget means nothing. The results are in. By now, the news is out, all over town, as Hank Williams would say. We’ve got a winner … Continue reading

The Pratties 2015 – The race is on!


Okay youse guys and gals, it’s once again time to run the Climate Prat of the Year competition, also known as the Pratties. Right, let’s clear the definitions, rules and boring regulation stuff first. This year, it’ll be the same procedure as last year and indeed the same procedure as it is every year. First off, if you’ve … Continue reading

We’ll always have Paris …


This is another guest article by Graeme, one of our regular contributing authors. It deals with the dire consequences of deciding nothing at COP21, otherwise known as the climate conference of 2015 in Paris. I’m not quite sure, but I think Graeme is trying to outdire all those dire prognostications which have been force fed … Continue reading

The Greenskull Chronicles – A matter of image.


‘This better be good’ growled Greenskull, pissed at the interruption as Gerald entered his office. ‘I’m sorting out that French fucking farce at that climate can-can in Froggie land’. Things weren’t going too well on that particular front, Gerald somehow intuited … Gerald, who apart from Monica and no other living person in the world … Continue reading

Crisis management – a green perspective.


Greenskull’s official title was Chief Co-ordinator of Information Management, which is a nice way of saying he was in charge of all PR for the “cause” or to put it more simply, a spin doctor, and he was good at it. Things had been going rather badly in the wake of the Copenhagen disaster, hence … Continue reading

The Lerks and the Purks.


This is another guest article by Graeme No3, one of our regular contributing writers. It’s perhaps a cynical observation on my part, but it seems to me the prime function of any bureaucracy is to grow bigger. The massive infrastructure that has grown up to fight the threat of Global Warming, when there hasn’t been any … Continue reading

The Secret Protocols of the Elders of Golgafrincham.


This is another guest article by Graeme No3, one of our regular contributing writers. There’s an old adage, many a truth is spoken in jest and this piece in its own light-hearted way, ticks a lot of very serious boxes. Exploitation of idealism, hypocrisy, a loss of innocence, deceit and yet I still couldn’t help chuckling. … Continue reading

What I truly despise about the green mentality.


It’s about fear, paralysing self-doubt and above all, inward-looking. It has a veneer of caring but it is chronically selfish and insulated from ordinary people. Consequently, it can’t really relate to sweaty complicated variables like human beings. It simplifies them, abstracts them as objects, little unreal figures, digitised peasants populating the unspoilt pastoral landscape of their … Continue reading

The ultimate hack.


An article this week in India’s Economic Times newspaper reported on a formal complaint lodged with the Delhi police of sexual harassment from an employee of The Energy and Resources Institute (TERI) against one of its directors, a certain RK Pachauri, who also happens to be the chairman of the IPCC. Obviously there’s no conflict of … Continue reading

A Christmas Carol or What the Dickens?


This is another guest article by Graeme No3, one of our regular contributing writers. It’s a new take on an old story and just what’s needed to blow away those post-Christmas blues. Enjoy! Pointman —-<0>— First Stave: In the first place Marley was dead. There was no doubt about it. His partner Scrooge kept the old … Continue reading

Climate Prat of 2014 – We have a winnah!


Another year, an udder climate prat has to be crowned, if you’ll forgive the bovine reference because quite frankly, there’s been so many to choose from out of the herd this time around, but very few standout climaticus maximus candidati. In the whole history of the Pratties, we’ve never had so many people nominated and … Continue reading

There can only be one.


This is the bit I like. They’re all hopping up and down. Pick me, pick me! I cast a sneering, masterful look of complete and utter contempt over the whole fricking bunch of prats and pick out, agonisingly, one by one, the finalists. They all wave their little arms at me frantically to catch my … Continue reading

The Pratties 2014 – The race is on!


Christmas is bearing down on us like a massive chocolate fudge meteorite with a sprig of mistletoe on top and furry dice dangling underneath it. Before we all mellow into the season to break our dieting plans as well as our bank accounts, let’s get the Climate Prat of the Year Award underway, and out of the … Continue reading

The Twitter Chainsaw Massacre.


I think Da Mann is having a bad week. First off, all those greenies who were pushing him to the front and encouraging him to sue the ass off Mark Steyn and others for millions appear reluctant to support him the closer the hearing date gets. Not one amicus brief has been filed to help … Continue reading

28 Predictions Later or the Invasion of the Living Dead.


The plague started so quietly that nobody took any notice of the first isolated outbreak. To be truthful, we can’t actually pinpoint a single incident or even an inception date – there is no patient zero. Through sheer weight of numbers, they easily overwhelmed a few of the smaller skeptic blogs. The initial outbreaks were contained, the thermobaric … Continue reading

A family of sorts.


They call them flats in England, everyone else in the English-speaking world calls them apartments. I’d bounced out of one place on the planet Zharg and straight back into the world and a totally different spot on it called London, north London to be precise, and ended up in a succession of all-bloke shared flats. Same-sex … Continue reading

The scorning of William Connolley.


I think we’ve all had that pleasant surprise when something totally unexpected just drops out of the sky and into your lap. That happened to me last weekend when a creature called William Connolley attempted to comment on a piece I’d written about the Bengtsson scandal. If you’re unfamiliar with him, he’s infamous for editing thousands of … Continue reading