An interesting thing happened on the way to the theatre blog tonight.

Bluehawaii

An interesting thing happened on the way to the theatre blog tonight.

That’s the sort of prologue or connective phrase a stand-up comedian will use to move his set onto a bit of topical comedy about something, which if accurate and well observed, is always the best kind. It was Saturday and I was busy chiseling the next blog out of a particularly big and bastardly recalcitrant block of dimensionally-fuzzy granite I just knew a decent piece was somewhere entombed in, when I clocked a curious news item.

Some minor talk radio jockey had asked Julia Gillard, the Australian PM, if her live-in boyfriend was gay. Without being too judgemental, there have always been some rumours swirling about whether Julia was AC or DC herself and there’s always been a cynical view that having a live-in hairdresser partner was just a bit of salacious window dressing using him. The jock’s questioning wasn’t too aggressive but the initial reaction to him actually raising the question was him being suspended, and as if that wasn’t punishment enough for showing such temerity to his elders and betters, he was quickly fired within the next twenty-four hours.

I listened distractedly as I blunted another chisel and waited for the inevitable reaction. The admittedly limp dick journos of Oz would surely rally around, no worries mate. I waited and nothing happened. I waited a bit more. It was probably the time lag thingy kicking in, a reaction was surely going to happen. Well, guess what, it’s twenty-four hours later and the tarts of the mainstream media haven’t said a word. Not one. Not even a boo. In point of fact, Julia’s been on TV being quite queen-like and gracious about the terrible ordeal she’d been put through and getting a lot of sympathetic coverage. Lick lick, slurp slurp, bow bow. Even the BBC is running an apology piece.

What little remained of independent mainstream Australian journalism has just compliantly bent over and silently grabbed its ankles. If you won’t at least try to protect one of your own, you’re no better than a pack of feral animals.

I’m an independent blogger who’d rather take it up the rear from a Viagra-engorged Incredible Hulk, whose piece had been dipped in axle grease and then liberally sprinkled with the rusty metal shavings from an old Russian lathe than let a prominent politician zap a journalist for asking an awkward question, and I don’t particularly bloody-well like MSM journos either. That’s what Australian journalism has just done. It’s now a cojones-free zone but no worries mate, we’re still picking up a pay check. In the meantime, you want another tinnie before we go ask the government commissar what we should write today?

Try getting me fired Julia. Though I’m not Australian, I’m beginning to think I’m the offshore shape of any independence when it comes to Australian journalism. You guys and gals in Oz will soon be tuning into sites in New Guinea or Manchuria to find out what’s actually going on in your own country. Of course, you’ll only be able to do that until the Finkelstein legislation kicks in, and the Great Firewall of Australia is built. From then on, it’s welcome to the People’s Democratic Republic of Australistan.

I’m a reader and a listener to other people’s stories. The last thing I do is yap. By now, I know so many tales and they’re all the real material of life which I plunder shamelessly when I write. That’s the needed betrayal of the storytellers you have to do, if you want to write with a simplicity that people can actually connect to. There’s one story which I’m not sure I read somewhere or heard first hand or perhaps third. Perhaps both, there are so many stories.

This one was someone’s early childhood memory which concerned Elvis Presley of all people, and one of those dreadfully lurid birth of Technicolor epics called Blue Hawaii, if memory serves. His first appearance in the film was being paddled around a bend in the river on a raft by a half-dozen garland-bedecked Polynesian girls wearing bikinis as he warbled something that should have died a merciful death in an elevator up to an obscure ninth floor cat house in downtown Duluth or somewhere equally as dire.

It was a tiny local cinema and the storyteller recalled a massive giant of a biker standing up at the front and blotting out half the screen. In a stunned and distraught voice he asked out loud “What the fuck have they done to Elvis?” before stomping out.

Have a care Australia, you’re now on dangerous ground and right on the edge of the abyss. Push back now or in not too many years, you’ll one day find yourself standing up in shock after watching something and asking yourself, what the fuck have they done to Australia?

©Pointman

Related articles by Pointman:

The creeping betrayal of democracy in Australia.

Click for a list of other articles.

Comments
23 Responses to “An interesting thing happened on the way to the theatre blog tonight.”
  1. uninformedLuddite says:

    This country started dying(at least the country I grew up in) at least two decades ago. I doubt yours is much healthier. The problem is that there are very few men left and those that still exist are marginalised faster than you can say ‘castrato’.

  2. Blackswan says:

    Pointman

    So glad to see you’ve taken up this issue. A bit of background to the hairdresser rumours.

    Tim Mathieson, Gillard’s de facto ‘partner’ was nowhere to be seen before she toppled her predecessor as Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd. She had a problem. The PM’s residence (the Lodge) had never before had an unmarried occupant, let alone a single woman who had never had children.

    Suddenly, her hairdresser ‘boyfriend’ materialised.

    This woman, long rumoured to be AC/DC herself, and known for her blokey appearance with a pallid complexion and zero make-up, rough-cropped short hair, shirts and trouser suits needed to be re-packaged and camera-ready 24/7.

    Enter Tim, Australia’s “First Bloke”. No more mousey brown roots showing through for Joolya, her usually lank faded hair now always freshly washed with a deeper shade of red and (good grief) she actually started wearing make-up.

    The veteran radio jock Howard Sattler (recently diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease) had always had a reputation for not pulling any punches, and he was addressing what is perceived in the community as Tim the Handbag, Tim the Accessory, Tim who is not well -regarded in the community.

    He has been repeatedly booked and fined by police for driving Gillard’s taxpayer-funded vehicle in a dangerous and erratic manner, parking it wherever he likes, and saying to unwary waiters, traffic wardens and policemen – “Don’t you know who I am?”

    Sattler is not the first to be robbed of their livliehood by Gillard. She has stood in the Parliament and boasted of having two other journalists fired for daring to expose the truth about her past, and not a single one of their colleagues stood up to tell the truth of the matter.

    You’re right Pointy, there isn’t a solid vertebra to be found in our craven MSM, let alone a matching pair of cojones – amongst the lot of them. Not sure about the Incredible Hulk though …. LOL

    Our journos would faint or squeal at the sight of him – come to think of it, that’s what they do when confronted by Gillard.

    • Blackswan says:

      Update:

      It seems that yet another senior journalist and political commentator is now in Gillard’s crosshairs – Piers Akerman.

      http://media.smh.com.au/news/national-news/akerman-reignites-sexuality-outrage-4494610.html

      This ABC ‘Insiders’ program host, Barry Cassidy, is a bosom pal of Tim the Handbag and the last guest journalist who crossed Gillard (Glen Milne), found himself fired from this program as well his long-held senior position in the print media.

      Akerman seems to realise that it’s ‘groundhog day’ and history is rapidly repeating itself, so he backs off and later apologises to Gillard for his gaffe.

      Just another day-at-the-office for the Aussie MSM.

      By the way, Sattler the fired radio broadcaster, had held his job with Fairfax Media for 27 years and he was summarily dismissed on-the-spot. He isn’t going down quietly and is currently exploring his legal options.

    • Fred Furkenburger says:

      I have a couple of interesting stories on this. None actually confirmable but I would think they could go into the definite possibility category

      The first is a story related to me by a customer to my shop who claimed to have been on a cruise which Joan Kirner (ex Premier of Victoria) and our Jules were also on. They happened to be sharing a cabin and their behaviour indicated that much more was going on than just sharing a cabin. Now it is well known our Jules has “screwed her way to the top” (with a number of married men in the Labor movement) so it is quite within the realms of possibility that our Jules is AC/DC. Although I suspect she leans one way more than the other.

      The second is with respect to Timmie. My sister goes to a local gym which is owned by an openly gay bloke. He is of a conservative disposition and loves to catch up for a chat with her on politics. He claims that it is well known in the gay community that Timmie is gay.

      Ok, the last part of the story. I got talking politics with another of my customers. Now he claimed to have sat next to a senior official of the Electrical Trade Union on a flight back from Thailand and they got to talking about the Labor Party and how they gained government in 2007. Prior to the election the Labor Party figured that they couldn’t win without carrying Queensland. Enter young Kevni. They reckoned if they had Kevni heading the parliamentary party they could carry Queensland and win the election which they did. As the unions didn’t like Kevni they told him that they would support him with the express agreement that after the election he would stand down in favour of our Jules. Obviously after the election Kevni liked his new position too much and decided to welch on the deal. Hence the night of the long knives to dispose of him in favour of the unions owned, sorry preferred, Jules.

      The other side of this is that the Labor faceless men didn’t think that the Australian public would readily accept a single female in the Prime Ministership. So the answer to this was to find a bloke who could be seen as her “partner”. Now they didn’t want a bloke who was likely to roll over and make unwelcome advances to Jules so that’s where Timmie came into the picture. It had to be a bloke who was not openly gay so that he could carry out the assignment without upsetting Jules.

      You may have heard that Tim has purchased a block of land up Eildon Weir way with a caravan on it. I would say that Timmie is setting himself up for a life of retirement (with pay) for a job well done. And without anyone by the name of Jules in sight.

      Now I guess none of this is easily provable but it does sound like the kind of machinations that the Australian Labor Party are quite capable of and it does kinda fit together.

      • Blackswan says:

        G’day Fred, you have some interesting and quite plausible angles there.

        I lived in Canberra for ten years and am quite familiar with how the scuttlebutt does the rounds – from taxi drivers to barmen and baristas – everyone has their version of the latest scandal. The Canberra Press Gallery stays schtum, protecting their ‘sources’ and always hopeful of a compensatory ‘leak’ or policy scoop.

        Pathetic really. Their moral compass has swung wildly off-course for decades and they are such an incestuous lot that one almost expects to hear ‘Dualling Banjos’ played as a theme at Labor Party meetings.

        To say “We live in interesting times” is a massive understatement.

  3. Australia has sold out completely to the Green World of imaginary Global Warming and is the poster child for a carbon hating fake oligarchy……………..all done by less than honourable politicians who should never have anything to do with real people’s lives!
    This whole world is being turned upside down by these hateful miscreants!

  4. Arnost says:

    The cowing of the media is of course a concern. An independent and unfettered media is vital to the health of society: to ensure the electorate is well informed and to root out corruption and other unethical behavior in the elected.

    But this time I feel that there has been a set up – whether Sattler was intentionally complicit or not is irrelevant. He has a reputation for asking cutting questions and be duly delivered. And the compliant media did the rest.

  5. stan stendera says:

    My former woman person, Mary Lou and I were reclining is bed when she first spied Hillary. She and Bill were excusing one of their many scandals on TV. Mary Lou then made the definitive comment on Hillary: “She thinks she’s pretty but she isn’t, and she thinks she’s smarter then she is.” This applies to Julia Gillard to a tee.

  6. Keitho says:

    And the Brits have just cut their media’s balls off with a “Royal Charter”. An irritating media is part of the price we pay for the freedom of expression we all treasure. Even the phone hacking bullshit story was overhyped so the politicians could shut down investigative journalism.

    You will have noticed how the “children” were invoked via Milly Dowler which shows just how threadbare the politician’s argument was. All I can say is thank God for the internet and blogs like Pointman which help keep us better informed about the bullshit our politicians are up to.

    Julia Gillard is a disgrace, like Obama, a chimera created by manipulative politicians and a complaisant main stream media. Oh, and I hope the Hulk isn’t on the way with a pocket full of blue pills boet.

  7. Graeme No.3 says:

    Australia has had very politician friendly legislation for decades, allowing Prime Ministers sliding into defeat to “top up” their superannuation with a defamation case. Many past PMs (exception John Howard) have collected 5 figure sums with minimal media comment.
    In the current economic /political status the media are very cautious.

    Personally, looking at the video and hearing that voice (before I get to the off switch), I wonder whether Tim the toy-man isn’t a masochist.

  8. A.D. Everard says:

    The Aussies are just waiting for election day – and likely so are reporters, at least I hope that’s the case. Why be fired when the b**** will be gone in only a few more months?

    Of course that makes you right about their lack of backbone.

    And try as she might to look queenly and a victim (it seems a common ploy of hers when she’s losing), Gillard isn’t fooling anyone in this country. Aussies are fed up with her.

  9. Tim Butler (aka tucsontimmer) says:

    Good post over at Jo Nova’s last week about another example of Julia’s thin skin:

    http://tinyurl.com/mqquey9

  10. hazze says:

    Dr Banner awaiting the moment🙂

  11. webber says:

    I don’t believe you pointy. Only an Aussie has your occasionally rough but very funny turn of phrase.

  12. Blackswan says:

    Hey guys – Leave Joolya alone ……

    .. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WV41-vuw1sE

  13. It’s disappointing to think that Australia has gone the way of most of the western states. I thought the Aussies would be more “in your face” and less bend over than they have been.

    But given how successful the powers that be have been in subjugating everyone pretty much it shouldn’t be surprising.

    Roll on the Aus elections this year!!

  14. Pointman says:

    A hump day bump. A change in the weather. One for the Met office …

  15. Ron Christie says:

    Oddly enough, the province of Ontario, Canada’s premier (roughly equivalent to a governor in a US state) is an open, out of the closet lesbian, and nobody really seems to care. Perhaps if Julia came out (if in fact she needs to), she’d at least get points for honesty and moral courage. On the other hand, if Tim is just window dressing, maybe she wouldn’t get those points after all.

  16. Manfred says:

    Nice one Pointman. I hadn’t heard a squeak of Union lefty indignation at the firing of the radio journo. interviewer. Astonishing. Right under the radar and not a squeak across the ditch either.
    Sent to me by a friend in the UK, the following link said it all: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flAJmIs1d1I
    It’s truly extraordinary. Someone will be pulling some chains somewhere, much as they have learned to do with the C/AGW habit. I think the BBC pushed the sacking with a question about ‘free speech’. Really…a bit ironic in their case.
    Every day I thank the universe for the net, even if it means my mug lies in some facial recognition data base.

  17. Count Repugsive says:

    Thanks, Pointman, it’s good to read a properly harsh opinion on this. The Australian media is almost uniformly pathetic in its shallowness and its desire to avoid giving offence. Even conservative commentators like Andrew Bolt were tut-tutting over Sattler (the DJ) and were pleased when he was sacked. I don’t see why Sattler was sacked – however the question was put, the real issue was possible dishonesty and misuse of public money. The personal lives of politicians have traditionally been off-limits in Australia, but JGillard has such a lengthy track record of dodgy behaviour, both personally and professionally, that I don’t see any question as inappropriate where she’s concerned. Likewise her boyfriend, who’s being supported by the taxpayer and behaves in a manner inappropriate to the “position” he holds.

  18. Blackswan says:

    Now we have the G.R.O.G party – “stronger than the Tea Party” – Get Rid Of Gillard this election …

    Bumper stickers available here ….

    http://www.cafepress.com.au/mf/67014587/grog-party-bumper_bumper-sticker

    Hard to imagine Aussies settling down to some serious political debate over a cuppa tea.

    • Blackswan says:

      Cancel that order for GROG bumper stickers ……

      Gillard has just been rolled as Prime Minister by the man she undermined 3 years ago, Kevin Rudd. Both she and KRudd gave an undertaking to get out of politics if they lost the Caucus ballot, so it seems she won’t contest the September election.

      Interesting, because she can never practice law again and is under police investigation for extortion and fraud in her days as a lawyer. Wonder what she’ll do now. Decisions, decisions.

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